Podcaster Haley Radke invites Jeanette Yoffe to share what inspired her to begin a support group for adoptees. Discussion covers how to start your own group and best practices for peer-facilitated groups.
If starting or joining a support group feels too intimidating, don’t worry! Jeanette has a great idea for free support: find a listening partner.
- Celia Center
- The Adoption Constellation: New Ways of Thinking About and Practicing Adoption by Michael Phillip Grand
- Using the term adoption constellation vs adoption triad
- Adopt Salon constellation groups can include: adoptees, adoptive parents, first parents, foster youth, foster alumni, foster families, social workers, spouses, siblings
- Suggested Support Group Rules:
- We support each other here, we don’t fix each other – no unsolicited advice
- Everyone gets a turn to share (5 minutes). What’s your name, what are you here for – do you have a question, do you want support for something in particular? You can share briefly about your story.
- You can ask questions if you do want advice.
- You can be here and not share: OWL (Observe, Watch and Listen)
- Keep everything confidential that is shared in the group
- We need firm and safe group rules so we don’t experience secondary trauma
- Constellation groups help us examine adoption from multiple angles; helps in growing compassion and acknowledging it is a shared experience.
- Celia Center support groups have been featured on OWN’s Television Show, “Raising Whitley” and TLC’s “Long Lost Family”
- If you can’t find a group, don’t feel comfortable going to a group, don’t want to start your own… Find a listening partner! Book a regular call that is to someone who will just listen. Listen, receive and acknowledge.
- Support groups to listen, share and support; you can also have guests come in and present, maybe for 15 minutes on different topics – mindfulness, an education piece about trauma, sharing their story… but leave space for the group to still share and discuss.
- If a group has different members of the adoption constellation present, it’s best to have a licensed therapist to facilitate. For peer-led support, just having adult adoptees (for example) is safer.
- Celia Center Arts Festival | Adopting Resilience, Fostering the Spirit of Creativity
- Celia Center Arts Festival 2016 Summary Video
- Check out adopteesconnect.com for new peer-led groups starting in the United States (started by Pamela Karanova of How Does it Feel to be Adopted)
- If you have another resource of places to find in-person adoptee support groups, please get in touch so I can list it here.
Featuring Jeanette Yoffe, M.A., M.F.T., Marriage and Family Therapist, founder and executive director of the Celia Center. 5 Hours of Continuing Education.
Post-Adoption Transitional Support Series
Featuring Jeanette Yoffe of Celia Center
5 hours of Continuing Education
Watch the Videos – 1 Hour Each Module
Take the Test
Receive a Certificate of Completion!!!
This package includes access to all five modules of this series ($19.99 if purchased individually):
- “Module 1 – General Experiences with Adopted Children”
- “Module 2 – Developmental Issues & Care for Adopted Children Age Birth – 5”
- “Module 3 – Developmental Issues & Care for Adopted Children Age 6 – 8”
- “Module 4 – Developmental Challenges of Adopted Children Age 9-12”
- “Module 5 – Developmental Challenges of Adopted Children Age 12-18”
RESPOND-ability Parenting Class
6 SATURDAYS SEPTEMBER 24 – OCTOBER 29th, 2016
IF YOU ARE INTERESTED IN FUTURE CLASSES please email us at email@example.com
A 6 week class for parents connected by foster care and adoption. Teaching interventions and tools for connection, understanding, and facilitating developmental attachment with your child. Based on the book by Dan Siegel and Mary Hartzell, Parenting From the Inside Out.
The class is developed and supervised by Jeanette Yoffe, M.A., M.F.T.
A MUST for any parent. This class will EMPOWER you, build your CONFIDENCE, and bridge COMPASSION for yourself, AND your child.
- Learn how to manage your child’s overwhelming stress states.
- Learn how to manage your adult’s overwhelming stress states.
- Explore how our childhood experiences shape the way we parent.
This workshop will guide parents through creating the necessary foundations for loving and secure relationships with their children.
- How can we respond to behavior?
- Come close and ask, “Are you feeling …… because you are needing …..?” Continue in this way and your child’s needs for empathy will be met.
- She may need more support to release an accumulation of feelings. Make eye contact and gently touch or hold her, ask, “Do you want to have a cry?”
- Stronger feelings may require sensitive holding to provide emotional and physical safety. Ask, “Would you like me to hold you now?” It is important to hold your child only when you are feeling calm and when you generally provide sensitive attunement to your child’s needs. The younger the child, the more she needs to be held when she is upset.
- If your child is about to hurt you or another child, then first hold her to prevent the action, and then continue aware holding to allow her to safely cry and rage. Explain to her, “I need safety for you and Jemima, so I’m going to hold you and help you let your feelings out.
- If your child is having a tantrum, stay close, offer empathy, and make sure she doesn’t hurt herself or others. You might choose to hold her to provide extra containment whilst she continues raging.
- Feelings of fear can be released through laughter. Role plays about the feared situation can provide the balance of fear and safety to allow healing laughter to be expressed.
- Frustration about unmet needs for autonomy can be expressed through power reversal games, involving laughter and silliness. For example, the child runs after the parent, who mock screams, “Help, don’t chase me.”
- After letting out her feelings, your child will appear relieved, calm, and present. If you are able to be with her most hurt feelings, your child’s needs for acceptance will be met, and intimacy and trust between the two of you will profoundly deepen.
A monthly open support group free for all members of the Adoption Constellation: First Birthparents, Adoptees, Former Foster Youth, Foster, Kinship, and Adoptive Parents.
“If you look at a tree from one angle,
that is the only angle you are going to get.” – Jeanette Yoffe
A place for the Adoption & Foster Care community to come together to share stories, thoughts, feelings, and ideas, receive psycho-education, process grief/loss, and build strong bonds and connections. The group is facilitated by Adoptions/Foster Care Psychotherapist, Adult Adoptee Jeanette Yoffe, MFT, and a co-facilitator guest of the constellation each month.
Read More HERE…